August 14, 2013

7 Steps To Increase Intensity: The Alpha/Beta “Wealth Destiny” Quiz

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“Intensity clarifies. It creates not only momentum, but also the pressure you need to feel either friction, or fulfillment.”

MARCUS BUCKINGHAM, NYT best selling author and motivational speaker

“Any guy that’s not working with the same amount of intensity and passion that I do, I don’t want to know.”

ZAKK WILDE, Ozzy Ozbourne Guitarist

I’ve noticed a disturbing trend lately.

Women seem to be getting more intense, and men seem to be getting gayer.

I don’t mean that in a homosexual way (although that’s true too), but rather in a fairly non-politically correct way; men are becoming like women. And not the new intense manly women unfortunately … the old fashioned feminine women.

This is especially true of younger men either in or entering college. When I shake their hand I usually get a limp wrist. When I talk to them about their future, there’s no fire in their eyes – and that’s if they’ll look me in the eyes at all. They look lost.

What’s going on?

While I would love to delve into the underlying reasons for this (the communist instigated feminist movement, the systematic deconstruction of family values, and man’s willingness to go along with all of this because he has apparently lost his testicles), the purpose of this article is just to say YOU NEED INTENSITY IN ORDER TO BECOME WEALTHY.

Intensity is desire on steroids.

Intensity is the energy pool the entire Success Process swims in.

Intensity is the difference between you wanting or trying to accomplish something and you actually accomplishing it.

Intensity is the felt tension between where you are and where you want to be. To the degree you feel this tension, you will have intensity that drives you to your destination.

“Maturity is achieved when a person accepts life as full of tension.”

– JOSHUA L. LIEBMAN, rabbi and #1 NYT best selling author

Without intensity, you are as helpless against the forces of nature as a woman used to be against glass ceilings. But as we have seen … things can change. You too can become as intense as the best women out there.

So … in a heartfelt attempt to help fix the world and restore intentional balance, I’ve developed a scientifically ignored and clinically unproven test to help you determine just how intense you are. Or probably are not.

You have 30 seconds to complete this. Anyone with an inkling of intensity should have no problem with that.

Circle your answer on the screen with a #2 black Sharpie marker. Ready?


1. Are people slightly intimidated in your presence even without you saying anything?

A. Yes
B. No
C. I don’t like to choose between letters. I feel bad for the one’s left out.

2. Do you wake up in the morning with a burning desire to conquer things?

A. Yes
B. No
C. Conquering is imperialistic and barbaric. I’m more into world peace. I wake up with a burning desire to surf the U.N. website, check the terror threat levels at, and meditate on the deep meaning of the color green.

3. Do you have a hard time with relationships because your partner is always saying stupid stuff like “you’re too intense,” and it makes you want to break things?

A. Yes
B. No
C. This question is making me feel gay(er)

4. Is it a struggle for you to hang out with losers who you know are just going to lose big time at whatever it is they’re talking to you about at any given time?

A. Yes
B. No
C. I don’t struggle in general. That would imply that there is some sort of tension in my life, and I get soft tissue massages when that happens. Struggling is for professional wrestlers, and I just don’t want to wind up in the WWE. Look how Hulk Hogan turned out. He has a bad back.

5. Is it hard for you to wait for your goals to be accomplished while you work feverishly to make 100% sure you achieve them or else you will kill your dog? Like that’s literally what you have posted on your vision board: a picture of your dog with a sticky note on it that says “I will hit this goal by November, and if I don’t … he dies,” with an arrow pointing to the dog’s smiling face. You motivate yourself by the potential death of the one thing that brings pure joy into your life.

A. Of course
B. No
C. I am reporting this quiz to PETA. And I don’t need to email it because I actually am scheduled to attend a PETA meeting later today. I’ll simply print this out on recycled paper and take it to them.

6. Are your goals scared of you? When you write them down do you ever see all the words huddle up on the page and be like, “ok guys, this mother effer is for real. Do you see the look in his eyes?? This is no ordinary Homer Simpson who just watched The Secret and expects a check in the mail tomorrow. He is going to freaking achieve us. We gotta stick together. Let’s wait till he goes to the gym and then move over to the PETA dude’s goal list where no one will ever even read us again, and we’ll be perfectly safe.

A. Thank God. I thought I was hallucinating. This happens to other people too? YES.
B. No
C. This is starting to offend me. Goals are violent. If I achieve something it means someone else will feel bad. I prefer equality, harmony, and homosex … I mean peace.

7. Do you tend to talk louder than most people? For instance, when you whisper to your spouse or “partner” in a public place do they look around nervously and tell you to stop screaming?

B. No

[just circle “C” – I can’t hear you]

8. When you walk into a room, does everyone look at you because your personal power shakes them out of their trance and demands it? Do you “arrive” everywhere you go as opposed to just silently showing up and blending in? When you walk away from a conversation do people think, “there is something different about that person” as opposed to thinking nothing at all because you’re just average and there’s absolutely nothing special about you that anyone besides you and God are aware of?

A. Every time
B. No
C. I believe in being humble. Jesus was humble. Yeah everyone noticed him, formed crowds around him, and even wept uncontrollably when he was near, but that was because of his tunic. I did some research and it was a SICK tunic. I could make the ladies cry too if I had that tunic.

9. Is patience your absolute worst virtue no matter how hard you try?

A. Patience?
B. No
C. I am patiently waiting for this horrifying quiz to be over so I can take it to the authorities and hopefully ban this from developing into some demented viral meme that turns the world into a bunch of powerful wealthy people who continue to employ me.

10. Rate your level of personal intensity from 0 to 10. 0 being the lowest and 10 being the highest (for the person who picks “C” and has a hard time with basic concepts).

A. that scale isn’t big enough. I usually don’t commit to things with less than 5 zero’s at the end.
B. No
C. Ratings are racist. You know damn well minorities don’t know how to work the metric system. I’m calling the ACLU.

[end of quiz. Turn your computers over and set your markers down.]

Ok, let’s see how you did.

If you picked “A” at least seven times you have sufficient intensity for you and I to hang out and understand each other. “A” stands for Alpha. You are everything a man is supposed to be. Even if you’re a woman.

You may actually need to tone it down a bit as this test was greatly exaggerated for the sake of not being boring, but you are erring on the side of intensity which is better than the alternative.

If you picked B more than three times you need to do everything I’m about to tell you to do. Your life and everyone’s life in your general vicinity is in danger. “B” stands for Beta. You are currently a total loser and you can count the number of people who admire you on one hand (but only if that hand was in a wood chipper accident and had all its fingers cut off).

If you picked C even one time you are what I wish was an imaginary person but unfortunately you exist. Go hug a tree, and just stay there forever. Until a lightning bolt strikes it. “C” stands for Chump. You are everything no one should ever be. Say you’re sorry in a comment below.

If your computer screen has a bunch of black circle marks on it right now then I commend you for being passionate enough to do absolutely everything I say without questioning the sensibility of any of it. You’re exceptionally smart, and you’re probably going to end up super wealthy. Try to know when I’m being facetious though, that’s my only critique. Otherwise you’ll end up dead before the wealth comes. Just ask the “C” guy currently hugging a tree right now. But try to ask him like when the lightning is on the way down, before it strikes, but while he sees it coming from a distance. That’s when you’ll get the best insight.

The following is for the Beta “B”s of the world. Never fear. “A” is only one letter away.

7 Steps To Increase Intensity

Step One: Understand at a deep level that you most likely are kind of a beta wussbag.

Most people are; don’t feel (too) bad. If no one has ever said the words to you “you are really intense!” with a look of bewilderment in their eyes like they’ve just encountered some strange new species, there’s a good chance you need to amp up your intensity.

Do you want to see what this intensity I speak of looks like in real life?

It looks like this …

Now …

do you want what you want as bad as the guy in that video wants what he wants?

Heck no you don’t – or else you’d have it.

St. Pierre had the belt in his hand within a year from that day and has had it ever since.

I remember watching that particular fight and thinking, “that guy is going to be the best in the world.” I could see it in his eyes.

I also remember thinking, “how could I possibly be seeing this much intensity in the eyes of a Frenchman? I thought they usually surrender?” Apparently they’ve evolved right alongside the women of the world.

Question …

What would I think if I looked in your eyes?

Step Two: Start wanting to stop slacking with all the want you can muster.

You need to have your “enough is enough” moment. This is when you put your foot down, raise your head high, and say “I am GOING to win.”

This is where all radical and permanent change occurs.

You say it, feel it, and mean it. A spiritual fire is starting to burn within you. That fire is called Your Fight. You have to find Your Fight – your inner warrior. Everyone has it, but the world has stacked the odds against you ever realizing it.

The more you identify with the world system the less chance you have of ever finding Your Fight.

Unfortunately I have no idea how to manufacture this “enough is enough” moment. This is one of those things that generally happen to you rather than you doing anything to bring it about on your own. But I can tell you this much: the more intensely you want it to happen to you, the better chance you have of it actually happening. You know, the whole “seek and you shall find” thing.

Full disclosure: “enough is enough” moments tend to come in the middle of excruciatingly painful life circumstances. So make sure you really want to increase intensity. There’s a price to be paid.

Step 3: Get to the root of the problem and ask yourself, “Self, why do I have the intensity of Eeyore the donkey from Winnie the Pooh?”

You’re probably not going to know why so I’ll just go ahead and tell you:

your dad didn’t love you

That sounds a little harsh I know, but it’s probably true. It’s not that he didn’t feel love for you or love you in his mind, but when it came time to show it? He was a no show. Literally he was a No-Love-Show.

But not only that, he was also hard on you. Maybe even mean. Being hard on your kids is a good thing, but only if it’s mixed with love and mutual respect and admiration. Otherwise it’s a recipe for the 60’s sexual revolution, an AIDS epidemic, and General Mills putting the Gay Pride rainbow in Lucky Charms just last month …

And yes, they really did that. Google it. Then put your kids on a 5-Day detox if you’ve been poisoning them with that garbage for some irresponsible reason.

Unfortunately for me I didn’t find out until it was too late.

I accidentally ate one of the gay marshmallows.

Nothing has happened yet except for I just did hospital corners on my bed sheets, and I don’t know how to do that. But I’ll keep an eye on myself. So help me God if General Mills got me gay I’m going to break my rule of not suing corporations I own stock in.

I knew I should have never trusted that freakin leprechaun. Damn it. He was just so convincing and kept taunting me to chase him. Uurrrgh!

So yeah, if that’s you … you need at least 5-8 years of therapy, a strong, loving, very wise mentor, and Jesus. There’s no quick fix for 18 years of living under the judgmental shoe of a complete jackass.

“Whoever does not have a good father should procure one.”

-Friedrich Nietzsche

            Why do people insist on quoting this psychopath?

That reminds me … I need to tell you something. And this may actually help a little now that I think about it.

How do I put this?

The guy you call “dad” …

is/was not your real father

I am.

I didn’t know how to break the news to you so I figured now on a public blog would be the best way to do it. You see there was this one night …

Just kidding.


Let the life changing, all-powerful, dewussifying truth of that sink deeply into your dome right now.

The God of this universe, the creator and owner of everything is your dad. Not just theoretically or conceptually. REALLY. And he loves you. He’s proud of you. And he’s cheering you on, and waiting to help you … if you’ll just humble yourself and ask.

Did you think you could do this on your own? How’s that been working out for you so far? Who do you think you are exactly? You’re an idea in God’s mind that is here now and gone tomorrow. You barely exist! You darn sure better ask for God’s help because everything you have currently and ever will have HE OWNS.

“If anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.”

– PAUL, a.k.a. The Genius Of The World

And yes, there is a God. Contrary to historically new trends in thought (which are typically historically wrong), it’s not fools who believe in God. It’s fools who do not. You can find that out the easy way or the hard way.

Want proof? Watch this video when you’re done reading this article …

My point is this …

Your earthly father was nothing more than a temporary babysitter who sucked at his job.

Lucky for you, God had nanny cams set up so it will all get sorted out soon. Until then, God feels bad for you. But not that bad.

Get up and fight like a man.

And for the record, there are other reasons for being naturally passive (beta). But mean/non-loving dad is the #1 pattern I’ve personally noticed. They just beat The Fight right out of you. Very challenging (but possible) to recover from.

Step Four: Find your Inner Fight by actually learning how to fight.

“When I fight someone, I want to break his will. I want to take his manhood. I want to rip out his heart and show it to him.” – MIKE TYSON

This is what intensity sounds like.

Prior to learning mixed martial arts, I was a complete pussy. I’ll be the first to admit it. I had intensity, but it was a fake version of it. It was more bravado than anything – an over-compensation for a felt sense of inner powerlessness.

Luckily I had the self-awareness to know my true inner puss-like state so I paid a professional UFC fighter to beat me up on a regular basis. Literally. I told him if I wasn’t bleeding or bruised significantly at the end of each session I would stop paying him.

I got black eyes at least once a week.

I got a broken nose that leans to the left now.

I got broken ribs.

I got beat up so bad that I literally cried like a baby one time. In front of people.

But I also got … powerful intensity.

So just ask yourself this …

How bad do you want it?

Don’t be scared. My 10-year old nephew is doing this for crying out loud. I think you can handle it.

Here’s how to know if you need to learn how to fight or not:

If you’re not fully convinced in your mind that you can beat up just about anybody that hasn’t also trained with a UFC fighter … you need to learn.

It’s not important to beat people up (usually). But it’s DARN sure important to know that you could if you needed to. Otherwise you will act just like this cowardly, sorry excuse for a human being bus driver in front of a few puny little punk ass boys beating a kid to death …

What would YOU have done in that situation?

I know what I would have done. All three of those losers would be in the hospital right now, and my face would be all over the TV with liberal commentators saying stuff like “did he really need to throw the kid through the roof of the bus? That’s definitely racist. We need to increase bus roof funding this year by $300 billion dollars and make some new rules for things.”

If you want to find a place to learn how to fight just Google “Gracie ___________ (your city)” and find a place where the owner has a Gracie black belt. Anything else is stupid and they’ll only make you even more of wussbag than you maybe already are.

Step Five: Start failing DRAMATICALLY

If you’ve never spent at least one night in jail, you’re probably just not trying hard enough.

“Act now, think later” should be your knee jerk reaction that you have to fight to suppress and sometimes just go with. It will move you to do great things, but occasionally get you in a little bit of trouble. Big deal.

“Screw it. Let’s do it.”

– SIR RICHARD BRANSON, billionaire

Can you handle a little bit of trouble? Or does society have you so well trained that the sight of red-and-blue-flashing lights behind you strikes fear into the deepest recesses of your soul?

A friend of mine just called me up and offered me a piece of his online fantasy sports business in exchange for help with marketing. I thought long and hard about it for approximately seventeen seconds.

I now own yet another business that will either make me millions of dollars or potentially put me behind bars. I have no idea whether online sports betting is even legal. We’ll find out soon enough.

Stop pussyfooting around with everything you do. Start stomping around and causing a little chaos. There’s a difference between prudence and fear. Most people are consumed with fear.

Consider most laws more “general guidelines” than anything. Except maybe pre-meditated murder. That’s typically a good one to not consider a general guideline.

Step Six: Stop caring what random people think about you so much 

The general public doesn’t care about you at all, so why should you care what they think about you? Especially considering the fact that they’re not even thinking about you in the first place! 

Get over yourself! You’re not that important, I hate to be the one to break it to you. Everyone is thinking about their self – not you.

Look at this blog post for example. Does it look like I care what people think about me? I’ve offended pretty much every race and gender on the planet. And don’t waste your time with hate mail in case you’re leaning that way. One of my virtual assistants in Europe – the new 3rd world – reads them all and only forwards me the one’s she knows will make me laugh.

Step Seven: Don’t be afraid to offend people. 

Jesus offended darn near everyone. He called women “dogs”, religious leaders “vipers” and “hypocrites,” random people “fools,” and he whipped bankers with an actual whip which I wish he would come back and do again right about now. “Start with Goldman Sachs please. Amen.”

You notice I keep mentioning Jesus? That’s because he was the most intense human being that has ever walked this earth.

– he went forty days without food just to grow spiritually and see what it’s like to suffer. I went three days without food once, and I thought I was going to die. When’s the last time you went one meal without food?

– he walked into the Jew’s holy temple and physically destroyed the place. No one tried to stop him because he just looked too intense

– he walked on water. That takes intense focus. Try it.

– he willingly subjected himself to the most horrific torture and death man has ever known just because he loves you.

– he was too intense to stay dead. He came back to life with a mission to save the world. Kind of like Neo in The Matrix. Who knows … maybe he’s even talking to you right this second.

He’s saying, “I love you. But you need to stop being a sissy.”

So there you have it. There’s your seven steps. There’s actually eight steps, but seven sounds better because of the alliteration. So you’re going to have to figure out the missing step on your own.

Can you guess what it is? Leave a comment below and tell me your guess. Whoever guesses it gets to ask me anything they want and I’ll reply to it right on this blog. So tell me your guess and ask your question. I’m all ears.

And don’t forget to click the Facebook and Twitter icons to share the love with your friends!

Recommended Reading: No More Christian Nice Guy by Paul Coughlin

Ancient Wisdom To Memorize: the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force 

Affirmation For The Week: I am intense.

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